In light of what happened at hyper-chic Barney’s, maybe it’s
time for some race related etiquette tips.
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Robert Indiana |
1. If
you think you’re being followed in a store by security, don’t confront just ask
to speak to a floor manager, no need to get ugly because security is acting
ugly.
2. If
you work in a store and see someone that doesn’t fit the stereotype of the
typical customer, no need to buzz for security. Do your job and ask if you can
help, nicely. You could win
yourself a loyal customer.
3. If
you sit down at a banquette in a restaurant and the woman next to you snatches
her bag abruptly, you can either facetiously snatch yours or take a deep breath and a sip
of something (much more pleasant). If you’re the
snatcher, before you act, consider how this can make someone feel especially if
his or her hand isn’t in your purse in the first place.
4. As
you rant and rave about white people, consider that some of your friends have a
white parent whom they love dearly, respect the black parent too.
5. If
you find yourself being constantly asked how do you know the host of the
party. (This usually happens
when you're the only person of color in the room.) You can answer honestly or say,
“Honestly, it’s been so long, I don’t remember.”
6. Do
not speak for millions of people no matter what color you are or what religion
you practice. I was once asked why
there are some many unwed black mothers, I wondered out loud about so many
Hollywood unwed mothers and pointed out that I’m not a sociologist.
7. If
someone goes out of his or her way to talk about their best white or black
friend, there is an ‘ugh’ factor but don’t get mad, get glad that this person
may be culturally enlightened.
The poor etiquette directed at us or practiced by us is
deeply embedded in history. Race isn’t going away. But we can send
racism on its way with relentless acts of civility.