ARE YOU A HAPPY OR A MERRY WELL WISHER?

In this age of political correctness, few subjects have escaped its grip including a well intentioned 'Merry Christmas'.

What do you say? Do you dispense your holiday wishes according to the receiver? If you live in a city like New York, this could be a mess. Do you say Happy Holiday to your Jewish friends and Merry Christmas to your Christian friends and Happy Kwanzaa to your African American friends? (More on Kwanzaa later.)

Yvette covers it all in one fell swoop with 'Happy Holidays'. "It's all inclusive," she says. I prefer 'Merry Christmas'. I like the word 'merry' and that's how it makes me feel every time I say it. Just before Thanksgiving I'll say, "Happy Holidays".

We never, never wish any of our African American friends Happy Kwanzaa. It's not that we don't wish them happiness but we don't recognize that particular holiday. We do wish our mother Happy Kwanzaa because she's proud to celebrate it. Yvette was very disturbed when she read that Angelina Jolie wants to make sure her adopted Ethiopian daughter, Zahara, celebrates Kwanzaa. Why can't the family celebrate, Ganna, the Ethiopian Christmas holiday?

The color of skin shouldn't color the holidays. Yvette and I always find it entertaining when a white friend wishes us Happy Kwanzaa. We understand that their intention is to be politically correct or respectful. But Kwanzaa is a little different from the rest. Be sure and visit the Kwanzaa web site for some clarity.

Holidays are joyous. And you should feel free to spread that joy. Do what feels right. If you say Merry Christmas and you realize you just said it to someone who's Jewish, don't start correcting yourself and wonder out loud what to say. Just smile and keep on moving. If you are wished a 'Happy Hanukkah' no need to point out that you're not Jewish. A heartfelt thank you is in order.

So, Yvette wishes you a Happy Holiday. And I wish you a Merry Christmas. And a Happy Kwanzaa to you, mother.

Re-gifting: Beware, It Can Go South by Yvonne

A very good friend of mine visited me last Christmas holiday. She'd just come from another mutual friend's home and he'd given her a gift.

Photo by allerleirau

"What's that in the bag?" I asked, knowing it wasn't for me. We'd already exchanged gifts.
 "It's a gift from HIM." (From here on he shall be referred to as The Re-Gift Guy.)

She whipped two books out of the bag, one was about Dorothy Parker and looked very familiar. I literally snatched it out of her hands to study it up close, page after page.

"He gave that to me last Christmas. I left it at his house by mistake!"
"You're kidding."
"No, I'm serious. In fact, last year both of these gifts were mine. I can't believe him."

The Re-Gift Guy had made the ultimate error in giving, he kept giving but the same thing to a different person. He was well-intentioned and maybe a bit forgetful.  But, for once my memory, a little foggy at times, didn't fail me. I'm a fierce Dorothy Parker fan.

So, to all the Re-Gift Guys and Girls out there, beware! Keep a list of those spare gifts you find around the house. Maybe there was a reason it was in a bag along with some used ribbon.

And remember that social networking will betray you in a click with people boasting and posting what they got for Christmas and Hanukkah.  Re-gifting isn't the worst thing you can do but it sure could end up being the most embarrassing.  Shhh, not a word to The Re-Gift Guy.