Wednesday, April 15, 2009

THERE'S A BUTT IN MY SOUP

A couple of weeks ago, Yvette and I flew to Los Angeles to visit our father. The flight was pleasant enough. There was plenty of legroom and the crew was nice, only one got excited when she realized we were twins. Takeoff was smooth and when we reached the proper altitude we were allowed to move around in the cabin and that’s when the problem started. Butts, small and large were constantly in our faces, actually mine, I had the aisle seat.

Across the aisle from us sat a woman who was constantly getting up from her seat and finding reason to bend over to dig into her bag. We realized she was preparing her lunch. Not once did she turn around and say, “Excuse me.” She was a large woman and must’ve known that the aisle could accommodate but so much butt before it ended up in my face.

I guess we don’t think much about our butts because they’re behind us, but so are people’s faces. If you have to stop in an aisle on the plane be mindful of your surroundings, try and situate yourself on the side of a seat this way a passenger doesn’t have to look at the seat of your pants. Never assume that the person on the aisle is okay with your behind in their face due to lack of space. If it’s a split second okay but keep moving. And if you know that beverages send you to the bathroom often, be considerate and don’t take a window seat.

In restaurants where tables are close, there is nothing more unsavory than someone getting up and giving you a view from behind. Make your departure quickly and try to keep your butt out of another diner’s meal.

Maybe we should observe how flight attendants move around in cabins; they seem to do a fine job at keeping their butts to themselves. No?

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

How about people who cross their legs on the Metro North or LIRR and thus, the bottom of their shoe is 2 inches from your white pants. Or in your vision. I do not want to look at your nasty shoe for 45 minutes., nor do I want to worry about whether your soul is going to ruin my white pants. Put your foot on the Floor where it belongs.

Anonymous said...

Yvette weighs in about shoes. I find it incredibly rude when someone's sole is facing you. It's like giving someone your back.

Anonymous said...

How do the flight attendants do it? Did you ask? It can't only be that they are at a proper weight. It must be the training they got in flight attendants school. Maybe YvonneYvettetiquette can start a training program.